“Freedom is being disliked by other people.”
The Courage to Be Disliked by Ichiro Kishimi and Fumitake Koga is a thought-provoking book rooted in the principles of Adlerian psychology. The book emphasizes that individuals are not defined by their pasts or constrained by their futures. Adlerian psychology posits that people can change at any moment through their current choices and actions.
A healthy feeling of inferiority is not something that comes from comparing oneself to others; it comes from one's comparison with one's ideal self
Written as a dialogue between a philosopher and a young man, the book explores how individuals can free themselves from the constraints of societal expectations, past trauma, and fear of rejection. It challenges the belief that our past determines our present, asserting that everyone has the power to choose their own life and happiness.
(PS: I earlier shared my notes from the book, but this time around it’s in audiobook format - you will definitely enjoy the audio version, which mixes the best of human and AI)
It's that you are disliked by someone. It is proof that you are exercising your freedom and living in freedom, and a sign that you are living in accordance with your own principles
Here’s what this book teaches you:
You Are Not Determined by Your Past: The book challenges the idea of determinism, stating that your past does not dictate your present or future. Instead, your life is shaped by the meaning you give to your experiences.
Separation of Tasks: The authors emphasize the importance of focusing on your own tasks and responsibilities, and not worrying about what others think. By separating your tasks from others, you gain freedom from external approval.
Happiness Lies in Contribution: True happiness comes from contributing to the well-being of others, rather than seeking personal success or recognition. By focusing on community and relationships, you create a more fulfilling life.
Interpersonal Relationships Are the Root of Problems: Most of life’s challenges stem from relationships with others. The courage to be disliked means accepting that not everyone will approve of you—and that’s okay.
Live in the Present Moment: Rather than dwelling on the past or worrying about the future, living fully in the present allows for greater peace and personal growth.
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